Difference between revisions of "Civil defence lecture"

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Good morning, comrades.  
 
Good morning, comrades.  
The main weapon of mass destruction of our
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The main weapon of mass destruction of our potential enemy is the so-called unclear bomb. It is arranged like this:
the potential enemy is the so-called unclear bomb. It is arranged like this:
+
the nucleus is in the center, with an electron shell around it. A neutron flies in and hits the
the nucleus is in the center, the shell is around. A neutron flies, hits the
+
 
nucleus. Bam! Off fly three neutrons. Bam! We have three
 
nucleus. Bam! Off fly three neutrons. Bam! We have three
more neutrons. Where the first neutron comes from? It's classified.
+
more neutrons. The origin of the first neutron is classified.
  
Imagine the situation: you're walking down the street
+
Imagine this situation: you're walking down the street
and an unclear bomb falls on your head. Your actions?.. Wrong, you must first
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and an unclear bomb falls on your head. Your actions..? Wrong, you must first
alert the population. And only then start dig in. To do this, you
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alert the population. And only then may you start to dig in. To do this, you
should always wear an entrenching tool on the right flank. This is very important. Experiments
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should always wear an entrenching tool on your right flank. This is very important. Experiments
conducted abroad, showed that the corpses that failed to dig in have numerous burns.
+
conducted abroad showed that the corpses that failed to dig in had numerous burns.
 
Entrenched corpses had none.
 
Entrenched corpses had none.
  
 
Another situation: you're walking down the street and a drop
 
Another situation: you're walking down the street and a drop
of colorless and odorless fluid falls on your head. Your actions?.. Right, you must immediately
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of colorless and odorless fluid falls on your head. Your actions..? Right, you must immediately
put on a gas mask. To do this you should always wear it on the left
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put on a gas mask. To do this you should always wear it on your left
flank. You must be able to put on a gas mask in the standard time. Remember
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flank. You must be able to put on a gas mask in the standard amount of time. Remember
that the instantaneous death of mustard gas takes a while ...
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that the instantaneous death of mustard gas takes a while.
  
 
One more situation: you're walking down the street and a corpse falls on your head.
 
One more situation: you're walking down the street and a corpse falls on your head.
Your actions?.. Wrong, we must first give him CPR.
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Your actions..? Wrong, you must first give him CPR.
How to do it? With the hands. What if he has no hands?
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How? Use hands. What if he has no hands?
Then then with the legs. What if he has no legs? Then right to the mouth. What you say?
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Then use legs. What if he has no legs? Then do mouth-to-mouth. What did you say?
No mouth? Or the head? Then inject him a painkiller and take him to the field hospital,
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No mouth, or even head? Then inject him with a painkiller and take him to the field hospital,
 
where he will receive his first and last aid.
 
where he will receive his first and last aid.
  
 
Our lecture is over. You can take off your gas masks.
 
Our lecture is over. You can take off your gas masks.

Latest revision as of 02:06, 4 August 2017

English Russian

Good morning, comrades. The main weapon of mass destruction of our potential enemy is the so-called unclear bomb. It is arranged like this: the nucleus is in the center, with an electron shell around it. A neutron flies in and hits the nucleus. Bam! Off fly three neutrons. Bam! We have three more neutrons. The origin of the first neutron is classified.

Imagine this situation: you're walking down the street and an unclear bomb falls on your head. Your actions..? Wrong, you must first alert the population. And only then may you start to dig in. To do this, you should always wear an entrenching tool on your right flank. This is very important. Experiments conducted abroad showed that the corpses that failed to dig in had numerous burns. Entrenched corpses had none.

Another situation: you're walking down the street and a drop of colorless and odorless fluid falls on your head. Your actions..? Right, you must immediately put on a gas mask. To do this you should always wear it on your left flank. You must be able to put on a gas mask in the standard amount of time. Remember that the instantaneous death of mustard gas takes a while.

One more situation: you're walking down the street and a corpse falls on your head. Your actions..? Wrong, you must first give him CPR. How? Use hands. What if he has no hands? Then use legs. What if he has no legs? Then do mouth-to-mouth. What did you say? No mouth, or even head? Then inject him with a painkiller and take him to the field hospital, where he will receive his first and last aid.

Our lecture is over. You can take off your gas masks.